Sher-ruff of Venice
The Law End Force
Human
by
Calvin
Tales along the Canal Banks
in Venice Beach
California
Sighting and attempted
capture of mythological anti-war creature. Report filed by Jacob La Mountey the
Sher-ruff of Venice.
On a night in November George Crassfar
slept while wriggling in his sleeping bag. He was having a nightmare, a
flashback about some war in a jungle on a river. Tumbling down the bank of the
canal in Venice Beach California he was jolted awake in the
water.
While sinking into the green
slimy water plants he struck something warm and feathery in the depths of the
canals. Suddenly a warm tongue shot out of the darkness ,grabbing him by the
throat and spinning him around. The tongue wrapped around his head and then
began pulling him towards a large gaping mouth. A purple air bubble came from
the feathered hole and encased his head. The bubble began swirling around his
head as he was being pulled upward towards the surface of the canal. His mind
flashed in phantasmagoric bliss as the gases from the creatures bubble mixed
with the swamp gas as he surfaced. He found himself being spun around in a large
whirlpool created by a antigravity vortex. Bullious Muddy Duck-O-Luckus, one of
the strangest beings in the know universe, had taken hold of
George.
Remembering the stories he
had heard from a waitress who worked in a HOT local hang out about the anti-war
beast. This creature if captured and treated kindly would bring peace to the
world. Suddenly the tongue holding onto him uncoils and George is flung onto the
canal bank.
Scurrying up from the
canal bank, he runs to a nearby phone booth. Frantically he phones his friend
the Sher-ruff of Venice and tells him of his strange experience. The Sher-ruff
tells him to keep the creature under surveillance while he gathers up a peace
poesy to attempt the capture of the mythological creature.
Jacob La Mountey jumps into his 1965
Dodge Polara (fueled by propane) and heads for the canals. While racing towards
his friend, he calls the most powerful beings know to walk the streets of
Venice, the VBIG Barbellous Brothers. He also calls the champion Middle Eastern
wrestler, Moose Moe Hammerhead and his friend Rubin the Street Bruin. With the
peace poesy rounded up, they head for the spot where George is hiding in the
bushes keeping his eyes glued to the
Beast.
Tires squealing, the Polara
stops on the bridge over the canals.Flow Viva Venice walks sleepy eyed over to
the Sher-ruff. She offers to pour her morning wake up into the canal to
anesthetize Bullious. Moose Moe Hammerhead and the VBIG Barbellous Brothers dive
into the canals and commence to wrassle the creature. Rubin the Street Bruin
jumps into a canoe and paddles into the frothing whirlpool. The canoe is caught
in a vortex undertow and Ruben the Street Bruin flips over landing on top of
Bullious. The Sher-ruff strips to his underwear and dives on top of the beast
trying to ride him like a wild rhino.The L.A.P.iDary society decide to send in a
squadron of hellocoptus to capture the Peace
Beast.
The incredible Bullious sucks
all the canal water up, creating a huge twirling water spout. A huge
Cumulonimbus cloud forms over Venice Beach. Exhausting his captors, the Peace
Beast disappears into a billowy thunderhead.
Bullious Muddy
Duck-O-Luckus
ESCAPES CAPTURE
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted: Fri - November 1, 2002 at 06:37 PM